IngramJ Mar 6 2005, 08:40 PM Game: Kyle vs Ailiuns Genre: WTF?! Creator: Happy Productins Description: Dodge visitors then kill a giant visitor in order to rescue Stan Rating: 4% Review: Happy Productins, as we all know, is by far the "best" SPGamer we know by far, as the creator of Cartmans Adventure, South Park Fire, South Park Poleice Patroll and finally, his masterpiece, Kyle vs Ailiuns rolleyes.gif The masterpiece is better than the other 3, since it has better used MIDIs, such as Genocide and Movie of the Week, and it has WAVs, but it's still some of the freshest shit known to mankind. The game starts off with a short intro (which can't be skipped) and then you are taken to the main screen. There is the title, a badly-drawn visitor, and the instructions "Pres shoote 2 strutt" aka: Press shoot to start. Then you start the game. You play as a funny little Kyle sprite and dodge more badly-drawn visitors to get across 3 platforms and touch the sentence "GOE 2 NEKST BITT", if you fall off screen, you will have to reset, as there is no Game Over screen dry.gif The next 2 levels are exactly the same as each other. Then you are treated to a cutscene (OMG smile.gif ) showing a giant visitor touch Stan, making him go "blip" and magically disappear ohmy.gif Kyle then retorts "Yoo killed Stan I wunt u 2 dy". His angry eye brows are obviously not part of the sprite, since when Kyle moves away, the brows are still where they were. Then you will be taken to a boss battle where the "Stan-killer" is randomly bouncing about and you shoot him until his life runs out (he only has about 6 life-points) dry.gif Then Stan appears and tells Kyle, "Fank yoo 4 reskuuing mee", then Kyle says the say dialogue he said in the opening cutscene, which was "Oh noe I gota stop thum I do it now cya" then moves away. Then you will have completed this POS ph34r.gif At least he protected it (I was a little bit naughty once and tried to open up this crappy application to see what he did to make it), unlike his other 3 games. The only reason I gave Happy Productins 4% for the game was because I love crappy games and the amount of improvement Happy Productins made, so even if you want to see his improvements, don't bother playing this unless you love crappy games or you've played Happy Productins' other applications and wish to see this one also biggrin.gif RCBlazer Aug 30 2005, 09:00 PM Game: Kyle vs. Ailiuns Genre: WTF?! Creator: Happy Productins Description: Laugh out loud at the insanely bad gameplay and cutscenes! Rating: 1% Review: I just had to see this one for myself. One of the three laughably horrible games by Happy Productins (The other 2 being Cartmans Adventure and South Park Fire.) The game starts with an unskippable cutscene of a blotch of round shapes that are supposed to be Stan telling a giant ugly sprite of Kyle "I HURD THAIRS AILIUNS CUMING 2 EARTH U GOTA STOP THUM". The giant Kyle responds with "OH NOE I GOTA STOP THUM I DO IT NOW CYA", then walks right through "Stan", which brings up the title of this game. What is an "Ailiuns" by the way? Oh well, guess I'll "pres shoote 2 strutt" and find out! The first few levels has you controlling the ugly Kyle sprite while "dodging" the funny shaped alien heads that move back and forth. Dodging is put in quotation marks in the last sentence because really, you don't have to dodge them at all, because although bumping into one takes away one of the blue men that supposedly were there to represent Kyle's extra lives, there isn't any penalty for running out of lives! The only real danger is if you fall off the bottom of the screen (or the left and right sides of the screen for that matter) as you will then be forever trapped until you reset and start again or better yet close the game, delete it from your hard drive, and vow to never play it again. If however you make it to the words in the corner that say "GOE 2 NEKST BITT", you'll be treated to two more levels of the same gameplay, only both levels are exactly the same as each other! After clearing those two levels, you get to watch another cutscene of a giant funny shaped alien head bumping into "Stan" and making him disappear with a "blip" sound. This makes giant Kyle angry, and you won't like him when he's angry! ROOOOOOAARRR! KYLE SMASH! (Actually, that likely would have been a better line for the game then "YOO KLILED STAN I WUNT U 2 DY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!") Kyle then charges into battle against Stan's "killer", leaving behind his eyebrows to float in the air behind him. Too bad for the giant alien head, he has even less of a chance of defeating Kyle then his smaller lackeys, as not only is Kyle still immortal, but now he shoots bullets from his head! After you defeat the giant alien head, the end cutscene plays where the supposedly dead Stan appears onscreen and says "FANK YOO 4 RESKUUING MEE" Kyle responds with "OH NOE I GOTA STOP THUM I DO IT NOW CYA" (The exact same line he had in the opening!) before once again walking through Stan to the left. The words "the end" appear (At least he spelled that correctly!) followed by the horribly spelled credits. In short, if you're extremely bored and need a quick laugh, download this or any of Happy Productins' other two games and be amused for the half-minute it takes to win them, otherwise avoid like the plague! Wormmaster Jun 1 2006, 03:09 PM Game: Kyle vs Ailiuns Genre: WTF?! Creator: Happy Productins Description: Playing as Kyle, you must save Stan from the "ailiuns". Rating: 2% Review: So, I again double-click the icon of a Happy Productins game. I'm already ready for a true crapsterpiece, but this totally knocked me out. First, we see a cutscene where Stan comes and tells Kyle that "ailiuns" have attacked. Kyle then says that he'll stop them and somehow walks so that Stan gets to stand on his gut. Then we come to the main screen, which has a head of an alien in it. It says: "pres shoote 2 strutt". Strutt? Oh for f-MOVING ON! Now we come to the first level, where I must move on the platforms dodging the aliens in the progress. I do it and touch the flashing text saying "GOE 2 NEKST BITT" and I get to the next level, that also shares the same meaning. I repeat what I did and touch the text again to go to the next level... WHICH IS THE EXACTLY SAME AS THE LAST ONE! Oh for the love of... I repeat the progress AGAIN. A cutscene is shown, where an alien eats Stan, letting out a 'blip' sound for some reason. Then Kyle yells at the alien and moves, leaving his angry eyebrows into the background. -.- The boss battle. I press Control to shoot the big alien with black circles coming out of Kyle's hat. I kill the alien and Stan thanks me for rescuing him. For some reason, Kyle answers "OH NOE I GOTA STOP THUM I DO IT NOW CYA". What the fuck? Also one noticeable bug is that even though you lose all your lifes, you don't lose the game. You just continue on. Overall... ... ... DON'T TOUCH THIS PIECE OF CRAP!